The Anatomy of Peace, Expanded Second Edition
Resolving the Heart of Conflict
By: The Arbinger Institute
Narrated by: Oliver Wyman
Length: 6 hrs and 5 mins
Release date: 11-13-15
Publisher: Blackstone Audio, Inc.
Genre: Relationship, Self Development
My Rating: 5.0 of 5.0 Overall; Story 5.0; Narration 5.0.
What if conflicts at home, conflicts at work, and conflicts in the world stem from the same root cause? What if we systematically misunderstand that cause? And what if, as a result, we systematically perpetuate the very problems we think we are trying to solve?
From the authors of Leadership and Self-Deception comes an international best seller that instills hope and inspires reconciliation. Through a moving story of parents who are struggling with their own children and with problems that have come to consume their lives, we learn from once-bitter enemies the way to transform personal, professional, and global conflicts, even when war is upon us.
Download the accompanying reference guide.
©2006, 2008, 2015 Arbinger Properties, LLC (P)2015 Blackstone Audio, Inc.
When I picked this audiobook (originally and last week for reading), I wasn’t sure if I would like it or have to push through it. I was wonderfully surprised when I recognized the narrator’s voice (from fiction series Monster Hunter International) and was pulled right in. Although this is nonfiction to the extent it is a self-development work, it is told in an engaging story through the eyes of parents who are struggling with out of control teens. The primary character is also suffering from implosion at his company so the lessons in the workshop hit home doubly for him.
The parents meet in a two-day session to support their children who are entering an intervention camp program. The parents have reason to be secretive, wary and judgmental until the leaders share a story of political/cultural enemies who found their lives transformed by changing their views. The leaders are two unlikely companions: Yusuf al-Falah, a Palestinian Arab and Avi Rozen, an Israeli Jew.
The premise of the presentation is that people live with either a heart at peace or a heart at war. Too often it is the heart of war as we set expectations for others that we don’t necessarily require of ourselves. Since a ‘heart at war needs enemies’, we lift ourselves up at the expense of others and find (untruthful) ways to justify our own behaviors – most often by transferring the blame to others. It often involves self-betrayal (our desires supersede honor) which fuels the anger and unhappiness within us. We must determine to see the worthiness of others so that we can provide ourselves with a heart at peace.
This reminded me very much of the transactional analysis program I took in my 20’s. The bottom line I was reminded of is: we cannot change the behavior or actions of others but we can accept responsibility for and change our own actions (and reactions).
The audio book came with a download resource of the graphs and worksheets that provide direction to identify strengths and weaknesses and help focus on getting out of wrong thinking ‘boxes’. I see so many people, family and strangers, who I think could benefit from reading this book.
Audio notes: I recognized the voice of Oliver Wyman immediately and it made my heart happy. This is very different from the Monster Hunter series he narrates but he does a great job with this too. His voice and character voices pulled me in right away and helped me feel as part of the workshop with the characters. The story and narration are a great fit.
Source: Audible Daily Deal 2016, $2.95. This qualifies for 2019TBR, 2019Audiobook and nonfiction goals.